I know nobody likes interviews, but I suspect I squirm more than most people when subjected to them. I'm always acutely aware of the sound of my own voice, which has suddenly gone way too fast/high/quiet/posh/monotonous, and as for my face - should I smile, or will that just make me look manic? Am I blinking too much? Am I unconsciously wrinkling my nose up in an incredibly unattractive fashion to adjust my glasses? I know I should react somehow when the interviewer is talking to me, to show that I'm engaged and interested, but I end up just saying 'right' over and over again. Well, what else can you say?
I also lack confidence in a big way. When asked whether I'll be able to carry out whatever menial function the job entails, the correct answer would be "Yes, I can do that standing blindfolded on my head with my right arm tied behind my back, and still be far better than any other candidates you may have scraped from the bottoms of barrels." Instead I say modestly that I think I probably could if they would be so kind as to let me try.
Everyone has one interview subject they dread coming up. I got mine today: "We've looked at your website, and..."
"You seem to have quite a sense of humour..."
Uh oh, again. Still, if they had looked all that closely they wouldn't have allowed me into the building.
"Do you think you'd be able to cope with handling very boring documents day in day out?"
Honestly. Have they not looked at any of the previous websites I've worked on? Very few of us get the opportunity to be wild and wacky in their daily grind. Even the president of the Acme Novelty Co. probably has to wade through the paperwork occasionally.
(I see that my subject line will make no sense if I don't reveal that the potential job is for Kensington & Chelsea Council. So now you can stop correcting my spelling and commence ROFLing.)
PS: Thanks to the useless design of my Interview Trousers, which have no pockets, I have come out without my housekeys. addedentry, please get the earlier train if you can. You will find me sitting on the doorstep.