Alice Dryden (huskyteer) wrote,
Alice Dryden
huskyteer

We're Just A Habit, Like Saccharine

addedentry broke up with me on Tuesday night.

I think at the moment we're both hoping this is somehow fixable. How a fix might be attained, and whether attempting such would be a good or bad idea, we don't know, and nobody can decide that for us - although any wisdom or insight is, of course, welcome.

Something has to change, certainly, but it's hard to change things when you're unhappy and scared; hard to tell the difference between clinging to something because it's worth fighting for and clinging because you're afraid to let go.

I would not be the person I am today without Owen. Until I was nineteen, I never imagined that anyone outside my trenchcoat-clad fantasies could ever fall in love with me. But he did, and while being in a relationship and experiencing the consequent new emotions often terrified me, it also made me happier than I had known I could be.

I love him very much, and he's my best friend. The thought of saying goodbye to all that after seven years is obviously something of a sucking chest wound.
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